Stop blaming others for your problems. Aren’t you tired it? We often stop losing weight, quit going to the gym, or end a relationship because we don’t want to take responsibility for our actions. We make excuses for why things aren’t going well.
Blaming others for your misfortunes or problems in life is like blaming gravity for a fall. It will not and has never created much difference in life. It only blocks your mind from having the conviction that you have the power to change your life.
You have heard about the familiar phrase “the blame game.” What is it? The tendency to blame external factors for one’s actions. Blaming is nothing but a shield against responsibility and accountability.
Five Reasons to Stop Blaming
It is okay to make a mistake – everyone does. But it’s dangerous to blame your failure on others. When you blame others, you give yourself an excuse to be lazy and not try as hard. Blame turns into discouragement. And blaming takes away your power.
Discouragement turns into resentment. Resentment turns into hate. Mistakes might be human, but blaming others is not.
Consider some of the most common effects of blaming others:
1. Blaming others stops you from finding solutions. Blaming is a self-defensive approach to handling situations. Whenever you blame others for a situation, you hide from finding adequate solutions to it.
2. Blaming others leads to mistakes. If we blame others, we misdirect ourselves and others from our major contribution towards the mistake. It leads to unhelpful emotions, such as anger, resentment, and hatred.
3. It creates animosity and hurts relationships. Blame harms our social relationships with families, schoolmates, work colleagues, and marital life. It generates unnecessary emotions against each other, which creates conflict.
4. When you blame others, you don’t take responsibility for your own life. People who blame others assume the world as a perfect space. They think all conditions should be in their favor and if it is not, they push it to some external factors.
5. Blaming others prevents us from constructive criticism and self-reflection. Self-reflection informs the choices we make in every situation. Blame prevents us from seeing the accurate picture of situations. Accepting responsibilities and reflecting on mistakes is good for future occurrences.
How to Avoid Blaming Others
These strategies will help to stop blaming others for your problems:
1. Blame yourself instead of blaming others. When you accept responsibility for your actions, you can focus on repairing them. Beat your mistakes. The lessons will guide you forever.
2. Be empathetic. See the world through other people’s perspectives. Put yourself in other people’s shoes. That will help you understand their actions and inactions.
3. Practice self-awareness. It is good to recognize why you are blaming. Blaming can fulfill different functions. There is always an underlying intention for which we blame others. Discover that and improve on it.
4. Take responsibility. Accept ownership of your part in every situation. If you identify all the variables surrounding every situation, you’ll be able to determine those in your control. You can then do your part to remedy the situation.
5. Don’t build a case. Building a case out of familiar patterns of the past is a recipe for blame. When you do so, you feed your brain with a negative filter that perceives things wrongly. It may lead to misinterpretation of situations.
Blaming is never a positive move in life! Instead of relying on someone or something else to solve your problems, take responsibility for them yourself. Only you have the power to change your situation for the better, so do whatever you can to get there.